Expatriating in France: When Motherhood Is at Stake

To become an expat for good, or to go back home? This is a question everyone ends up asking at some point while living abroad. After one year in Canada, in Nova Scotia, where I was teaching French at Acadia University, I had to make a decision: stay, or return to France? And even if the question seems simple, it really isn’t. This is not just a geographical choice—it shapes how I see my own life, and the place I want to occupy in the society I live in. Do I choose to become an expatriate—someone who never fully feels at home where they are, but who no longer quite feels at home when they go “back home” either? Or am I ready to leave for good, and return?

It was a difficult decision, and I know many of you have faced it too. At the time, I chose to go back. Many factors played a role. One of them was the decision not to distance myself from my family at a moment in my life when I was stepping into adulthood… and about to start my own family.

Being Far from Family During the Most Vulnerable Moments

What often weighs most heavily on expatriates is not one single event, but the long-term construction of family life away from familiar landmarks. Having children abroad means managing everything—from healthcare and everyday logistics to schooling—within a system that is not the one you grew up with. Around me, I’ve seen many families make the choice to stay abroad when their children were young, only to reconsider a few years later. Very often, that turning point comes when children reach school age, especially at the start of elementary school, around six years old. Questions about language, educational culture, and belonging become unavoidable.

My own family reflects this reality. My sister had all three of her children in Switzerland—German-speaking Switzerland, to be precise. During her time at the maternity ward, she faced real communication challenges, exactly when clarity mattered most. And yet, she also discovered an approach to post-partum care and infant life that she genuinely appreciated, different from what she would have experienced in France. Over time, as her children grew older, new questions emerged: schooling, long-term integration, and the desire for her children to grow up closer to their extended family. Today, she has chosen to return to France—both to reconnect with family on both sides and to give her children an education rooted in the French system.

These gradual shifts—healthcare choices, schooling decisions, and the need to plan for the long term—reveal a fundamental reality: living abroad requires learning to navigate systems without the implicit support of nearby family. Language becomes not only a tool for communication, but a key to understanding how society organizes care, education, and everyday life. I’ve already explored school-specific vocabulary in a previous article here, and for good reason: language reflects how culture and society structure everyday life.

Pregnancy and Early Family Life: Language as a Bridge

At this stage, language stops being a simple tool for communication—it becomes a condition for autonomy. Knowing which words to use, and being able to express doubts or needs clearly, can make the difference between feeling isolated and feeling supported.

Just like schooling or social life, pregnancy, childbirth, and early family life come with very specific vocabulary in France—words that reflect how care and family support are organized. Terms like grossesse, échographies, accouchement, avec ou sans péridurale, péridurale ambulatoire, voie basse, césarienne, sage-femme, maternité, CHU, prématuré/grand-prématuré, couveuse, or visite à domicile quickly become part of everyday conversations (see list at the end for all explanations).

For an expatriate, navigating this system in another language can feel overwhelming—especially when family support is far away. But learning the words can be empowering. Language gives back a sense of agency: it allows you to ask questions, express concerns, and take an active role in decisions that matter. Step by step, French becomes less intimidating, stops being an obstacle, and begins to act as a bridge.

Finding Support Abroad: New Words, New Networks, New Strength

This is where language and human connection meet. Learning the vocabulary of pregnancy, childbirth, and early family life in French is not about memorizing lists—it’s about being able to say,
« j’ai une question », « je n’ai pas compris », « voici ce que je veux », and actually be heard, in moments when the body takes over the brain.

Some structures in France understand this reality particularly well, especially when supporting non-French parents. Initiatives like Motherhood in France play a quiet but essential role: Johanna, whom I recently met, helps expat parents understand how things work, what to expect, and where to find support—without judgment or pressure.

This is what makes expatriation full of hope and new adventures. Choosing to live abroad means accepting distance. But it also means discovering new forms of belonging. And sometimes, learning the right words is the first step toward feeling truly supported—wherever you decide to call home.

Want to Go Further?

Enough with the story—let’s clarify the vocabulary!

• La grossesse – pregnancy

• Une échographie – ultrasound exam

• Le terme – due date

• S40 / S41 – week 40 / week 41 of pregnancy (« S » stands for « semaine » - week)

• Un accouchement – childbirth

• le travail, les contractions – labor

• avec ou sans péridurale – with or without epidural

• une péridurale ambulatoire – ambulatory epidural, which is more and more offered to give the possibility of mothers-to-be to move during labor.

• Par voie basse – vaginal birth

• Une césarienne – cesarean

• Un / une sage-femme – midwife (used for both men and women; literally “the one who has the wisdom of the woman”)

• Une maternité – maternity ward

• Un CHU – university hospital center (stands for « un Centre Hospitalier Universitaire »)

• niveau 1 / 2 / 3 – levels of maternity ward care, 3 being the level with the most qualified teams and equipments for difficult births (such as an intensive care section and a neonatal resuscitation unit)

• prématuré / grand-prématuré – premature / very premature baby

• une couveuse – incubator

• une visite à domicile – home visit from a healthcare professional

If this article resonates with you, have a look at Johanna’s activity here: Motherhood in France
Also, to help you on your Expat journey:

• Check out Struggling to Speak French? Here’s Why (and What to Do About It) for practical tips on speaking French confidently.

• Read Essential French School Vocabulary Every Expat Parent Should Know to get your kids integrated and understand the school system.

• Don’t forget to download my free vocabulary list of 1,500 useful French words here: 1500 Useful Words in French – Free Download.

And if you want to go further, I offer online conversation classes for expatriates, designed to help you integrate socially, make friends, and speak French without pressure.